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Is Your Virtual Assistant Letting You Down?
June 23rd, 2009 by Kendall
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Hiring a virtual assistant (”VA”) is like any relationship. At first, you’re both feeling the love and everyone is happy. But after a few months you may start noticing tasks slipping through the cracks or that you’re having to spend as much time tracking your assistant’s tasks as you used to spend doing them yourself.
Nobody likes to be disappointed, especially when you’re investing in someone who is supposed to make your life easier.
And no one likes to feel like a meanie. So, what do you do when you’re no longer feeling the love but you’re still footing the bills for your virtual support team?
Here are three respectful, yet powerful tips on how you can nip an assistant problem in the bud, without losing sleep or feeling like you’ve suddenly turned into a raging diva.
Tip #1 Stop Making — Or Accepting — Excuses For Your Assistant’s Performance
Sure, anyone can have a bad day but if you find yourself saying, “Well, I know she’s…(busy/not feeling well/taking care of family issues/etc.)” more than once in a short period of time then you’re making excuses for your assistant’s poor performance. Excuses create cracks in your sense of self-worth and personal power. Instead of excuses you’ll need to…
Tip #2 Have A Courageous Conversation
Let’s say your VA failed to get a task done when promised, despite having plenty of notice. Give her (or him!) a call and simply ask, “I noticed this wasn’t done on time, what happened?”
What follows next is critical! Does your VA own up and take responsibility for missing the mark or does she make an excuse or try to shift responsibility to someone else? What you’re looking for here is accountability, and a valid reason for the missed deadline that isn’t likely to take her off track again.
Follow up by asking, “What needs to be in place so this doesn’t happen again?” Listen for specific actions and commitments, not conciliatory promises.
Tip #3 Making A Request Doesn’t Make You A Diva
Complete your conversation by making a clear request that you need to have your time table for tasks met, without fail. Let your assistant know that it’s better to under promise than to under deliver. Make sure she’s connected to the fact that what may seem like a small task slipping through the cracks actually has a bigger impact on you, making it more difficult for you to focus on growing your business.
But Should You Really Have Such High Expectations? Yes! Here’s Why…
Listen ladies, as a business owner you’re in an amazing position to not only make a big difference for your clients but for all of the people your clients impact as well. Add to this the impact your business success has for your family and your loved ones and you start to see that if you allow anything (or anyone!) but the best into your life, it’s not just you that will be impacted.
So please, give yourself permission to set high standards. Believe me, there are plenty of assistants who will love and champion you by providing extraordinary service. Besides, when you expect the best, you often get it!
Posted in Money and Mindset • • Subscribe to this feed
Tags: money mindset, virtual assistant, women entrepreneurs
I have to respond as a VA myself and having had to have a “courageous conversation” a time or two myself.
1. We VAs are business owners, too. We DO want to do a good job for our clients, but clients are busy and sometimes forget little details that make a big difference. And then the clients are unavailable when we try to call, don’t respond to emails, or we get blown off. When that happens, we’re not thinking to ourselves, ‘Well, la-di-da. I’ll do it when I get to it.” I can’t speak for the rest of my colleagues, but the majority of them will whole-heartedly agree with me in saying we’re just as nervous and anxious ourselves.
2. Don’t give us excuses as to why you’re not providing all the information. Just do it. We are only as good and as efficient as you allow us to be. But, keep in mind - we’re not in your brain 24/7. It may seem like it sometimes, but its not always the case. When we don’t get everything we need and then can’t get hold of the clients - its really not fair to lay the blame on us.
3. Don’t act like a diva with us. We are here to assist you, to help you and to make your life better. But don’t expect us to put up with rock star behavior and keep on saying, “Please, ma’am, may I have some more?” It gets tiring and really not necessary.
It all boils down to mutual respect. The word “assistant” may be in the title we’ve chosen for ourselves - but where would any influential and successful person be without a team behind them?
Think about it from OUR end.
Comment by Dana Fortier — June 23, 2009 @ 4:33 pm
Thanks Kendall- this was really timely for me as I am about to end things with my current VA. VA’s have been invaluable for me but I have not always hired well- and there is a huge range of talent. SOmebody who is an amazing graphic designer was incredibly sloppy on administrative stuff- I now know that it’s difficult to get every kind of support from one person.
As my business has grown, I’ve needed different kinds of assistants- when it all comes together it’s incredibly wonderful for everyone. Mutual respect should be a given, the rest is a lot about finding the right match and where your priorities are.
But the bottom line is I have to have somebody doing all the technical and design stuff- and I totally appreciate that there are so many people out there willing to provide that kind of support.
Love and blessings,
Lisa
Comment by Lisa Claudia Briggs, LICSW — June 23, 2009 @ 5:45 pm
Hi Kendall,
Great article as usual. Another thing to keep in mind as a business owner is you’re going to need different teams at different stages of your biz. The team that helps you break 6-figures is not the same team that will help you break 7-figures. So sometimes what’s going on isn’t the fault of the VA or the biz owner but simply a sign that there is no longer a fit between them anymore. Just like VAs are specialized with their tasks I think they’re also specialized in who their ideal client is, and as you grow, you’re probably not going to be your VAs ideal client anymore. So the best thing you can do is have that courageous conversation and see what comes out of it.
Comment by Michele PW — June 23, 2009 @ 5:58 pm
Hi, Kendall.
Thank you for the great article! As a VA, I think that communication from both parties is vital to maintaining a great working relationship, just like any other relationship in our lives. Many solo entrepreneurs are first-time business owners and have not had the experience of having an assistant in previous jobs. The points you made touched on valid concerns shared by many of your readers, and if a person has the right VA, he or she will appreciate the communication.
As Dana mentioned in her comment above, most VAs strive to do the best job possible; we tend to see ourselves as a partner responsible for helping our clients succeed.
I hope that my clients feel they can approach me if an issue ever arises, or if they find their needs are no longer right for my team.
Thanks again!
Sandi Silva
Comment by Sandi Silva — June 23, 2009 @ 6:42 pm
Allow me to comment on the comments…The intention of my article was not to diminish the gifts a VA can offer. They are caring people who have a love of service and an amazing ability to juggle A LOT while making it all look like magic.
My article was written to provoke women biz owners to step up and hold themselves as powerful and to stop making excuses, which disempowers everyone. When each of us is in alignment with our own self-respect, we create more of the same around us. And, we can give more love and respect as well. It’s all about saying, “yes” to ourselves no matter what. Care to comment? (-:
Comment by Kendall SummerHawk — June 23, 2009 @ 6:42 pm
The role of a VA is to support someone with a big vision. Being a virtual assistant is NOT for everyone…just like being a caretaker.
The most important quality I always look in my VAs is a “serving personality” - dedication. I don’t mean this in any diminishing way. I simply mean that a VA should be ready to support the client with desire, eagerness, and attention in helping them achieve their biggest vision!
I currently have 3 VAs, 2 of which have been with me for four years. They understand my objective - to be entirely free of admin/technical tasks - and I love that they’ve helped me achieve just that.
If your VA doesn’t suit your style, goals, desired attitude, or skills - it’s time to get a new one.
Milana
Comment by Milana Leshinsky — June 23, 2009 @ 6:57 pm
Every VA is a business owner, too.
Comment by Dana Fortier — June 23, 2009 @ 7:26 pm
Hi Kendall,
After having read your initial article and additional comments, you certainly provoked me as a woman business owner. A business owner who is a VA. I believe your points could be made of any *team member* not just directed towards a VA.
Jan
Comment by Jan Schoenfeld — June 23, 2009 @ 8:11 pm
Hello Kendall,
What a thought-provoking topic! I’m a business woman and a VA. I have seen an increasing trend on the part of clients who look for assistance from a VA to want the VA to be “everything the business owner is NOT.” I don’t know about you, but being a Graphic Artist, a webmaster, a writer, an accountant, and an administrative assistant is one enormous set of skills, and yet, I see many requests coming through the Registry at my alma mater, Assist U, with just this kind of request. I can feel the “leaning” when I read these requests and they seem unrealistic to me, so I know I could never develop a reasonable relationship with that kind of client.
I adore collaborative relationships, and my strongest desire as a VA is to relieve my client of the administrative tasks I do so well and they truly don’t enjoy. At the same time, it’s very challenging to me to write all the plans and bring to flesh the dreams of so many clients … because the client hasn’t thought this through himself or herself. I suspect that some VA relationships go the way of all flesh because the client’s expectations may be unrealistic. I can picture some VAs not having the courage to say “No” to this type of client, and thus, their work begins to deteriorate.
I hope I have brought a different perspective to this marvelous discussion. I have a vested interest in successful VA relationships! And I have room for two more clients in my practice.
Warmest regards,
Pat Matson
Comment by Pat Matson — June 23, 2009 @ 8:43 pm
I agree that VA’s are business owners, and many of them do amazing & wonderful jobs AND they make us business owners look wonderful
I believe the point of Kendall’s article was to point out that’s it’s OKAY if there isn’t a good fit between you & your VA. I know many women (current company included) who worked with a VA that just dropped the ball. And more than once. We’re all human, and things do fall from the cracks at times.
But like Kendall mentioned, it’s about alignment and getting us biz owners to step up and not be afraid to feel and say that a particular VA doesn’t fit. Like any relationship, communication is key. And Kendall was telling us to keep those lines of communication open.
I wholeheartedly agree w/Michele PW that there are times when you’re going to need different teams at different stages of your biz. Just like in an “office job” there are times when people are promoted, demoted, or fired based on alignment.
Thanks Kendall for opening up our minds and giving us food for thought. And for reminding us to keep moving forward and stepping it up!
Dinneen
Comment by Dinneen Diette — June 23, 2009 @ 8:55 pm
I loved reading the article and all the comments. It’s really helped to give me a perspective of both sides - things I maybe hadn’t thought of before.
Communication, honesty and integrity are all key factors in a good working relationship.
So thanks, Kendall, and everyone who added their insight and tips. Much appreciated.
Karen Brunet
E S S
It’s not just a website… It’s the Mother Lode!
More Clients - More Sales - More Often
Comment by Karen Brunet - ESS — June 23, 2009 @ 10:56 pm
My first reaction on reading this article was that it was another one of those articles that was ‘having a go’ at VAs (as someone who has worked in this industry for over 7 years I’ve seen plenty of these!) but having re-read your article and particularly the comments that have been posted, I can see that this is a great article for VAs and clients alike - the information and comments posted have been invaluable, both for VAs to get a feeling of what clients think and want, and vice versa.
And I agree completely with Michele PW’s comments. I support clients who have multiple six-figure businesses and clients who are just starting out and the level of support they require is totally different - even down to the relationship I have with them. So sometimes it’s not that your VA (or other team member) is letting you down it’s simply that you and your business have grown to a point where it’s no longer a good fit.
And as a side note, before you start partnering with a VA you should really be having a phone conversation (at least a 30-minute call) with them to ensure you are both a good fit for one another - very much like you do when you are enrolling clients into a high end coaching program.
Tracey
Comment by Tracey Lawton — June 24, 2009 @ 6:00 am
To Dana, that’s why I hire a virtual assistant - to take care of all the little details. As a business owner, I’m SO not interested in digging deep into the details. Can’t stand them. So, my VA focuses on that for me.
My VA and I have worked together since 2007 and I don’t have need to find anyone else (she now operates a virtual team). What makes her AMAZING is that she focuses on the details. Sure, she may ask me to clarify things or if she’s doing something for the first time, she’ll ask for my feedback. However, we work well because I develop the vision & strategy while she focuses on executing the details.
I know that in the beginning of our relationship, we were just getting to know each other. At times, I was frustrated because I thought my instructions were clear, yet my VA needed more clarity.
But looking back, I can see that there were problems in my business model that made it difficult for my VA to support me fully. She and I had an honest conversation and we both recognized that in order for her to support me, I had to stop chasing every shiny object.
I’ve done 2 things that’s making my business run smoother and making it so enjoyable for my VA and I to work together:
1 - I have developed systems so that my virtual team know what to do and how to do it so I no longer become the bottleneck
2 - I now have 5 signature products instead of hundreds of individual ones. This helps my virtual team and I speak the same language and focus on fewer high ticket items than dozens of low cost ones.
Comment by Leesa Barnes — June 24, 2009 @ 8:34 am
WOW, Kendall, what a great article.
I am guilty as charged! I genuinely liked my VAs but this is the second one who has, on more than one occasion, dropped the ball. And I have said things like “she’s not been well” or other such excuses.
Thank you for calling me out to have those courageous conversations (I tried once and then took her back!) and stick by consequences if the results don’t shape up.
~Marcia~
Comment by Marcia Francois — June 24, 2009 @ 9:03 am
Hey Kendall and everyone!
Great discussion going on here. Thanks everyone for jumping in. I’ve not heard many of these points of views and it’s eye opening.
As someone who has VA’s on her team, I know that it is REQUIRED of me to be honest with my team members. I’ve had many calls with past team members where I’ve called them out on things I felt they should’ve been able to handle.
I know that mistakes happen. I give everyone a second chance, but if we aren’t communicating well enough for that second chance to work, then I’m letting you go.
It’s not that I’m being mean. It’s not that I’m being snobbish. What’s happening is that I’m standing up for the quality of service and outcomes that I want my clients to have. If I don’t stand up for that, then I know my business will sink fast!
Kendall, you’ve brought up a great point here. Too many business owners are afraid of being mean, so they are nice and keep on, keeping on. Sometimes that leads to sabotaging your own business.
Not everyone is a good fit. I’ve had clients that have had that difficult conversation with me. At that point, we either re-design our relationship or we say goodbye.
Stand up for what you want in your business. When it’s not matching, evaluate and see if there’s a way to create a match. If not, then move on.
Keep the discussion going everyone! I think we are all learning a lot here.
Comment by Kristen Beireis — June 24, 2009 @ 9:32 am
Hi Kendall -
I want to say thank-you for this article. I am a VA, who, unfortunately, has done exactly what you are talking about. In the past, I made the mistake of not managing my time properly and therefore lost a client in the process. Boy did it open my eyes! It caused me to put some processes and systems in place to make sure it doesnt happen again.
Although I agree with what others have posted in their comments, and yes, it does come down to communication between the client and the VA, it is also important to keep in mind that both own businesses and they both should run them like it.
If the client is not happy, for what ever reason - then speak up, dont let it get to the point where you are thinking of ending the relationship. Similiar, if the VA is having issues with getting what they need from the client in order to get tasks done, then there is a break in the relationship that needs to be addressed.
End thought - I did not think your post was attacking VAs at all, like others seemed to think. This was a topic that needs to be addresses, regardless of what side of the coin you fall on. Just my 2-cents.
Comment by Kristi Pavlik — June 24, 2009 @ 10:35 am
Excellent article and comments. I have only used Elance.com and never hired VA for my business. This article provides useful insight on dealing with VAs and their expectations.
Comment by Lalitha Brahma — June 24, 2009 @ 11:17 am
What a fabulous page I’ve stumbled upon here. Kendall, you wrote a provocative post that has brought out some really important points in the comments. Thanks to all!
Unfortunately, I perceive a huge disconnect between VAs and the general public. Our brand in a universal sense is not well defined. The range of talents and professionalism has no bounds. Most people, I think, equate VAs with overseas outsourcing (an entirely different thing). We have a lot of communicating yet to do!
Comment by Mary H Ruth — June 24, 2009 @ 11:25 am
Fabulous discussion happening here! The main thing to keep in mind is that this isn’t about VAs per say, it’s about RELATIONSHIPS. Because ultimately, how we handle our VA relationship says a lot about how we handle other relationships in life and biz. So keeping a clean VA relationship will improve others as well.
Thanks for the comments all!
Love to EVERYONE…
Kendall
Comment by Kendall SummerHawk — June 24, 2009 @ 2:07 pm
Wow, Kendall, you really opened up the floodgates here. But I’m not surprised. I’ve been talking to VAs, VA services companies, leaders in the VA industry, and entrepreneurs who’ve worked with VAs, about the VA/client relationship for the past 6 weeks. I have had over 30 hours of interviews so far, and boy is it interesting.
The virtual assistant is a relatively new invention (about 12 years), and there doesn’t seem to be one definition of the term that everyone can agree on — so it stands to reason that expectations differ as well.
Your point is well taken that it’s about relationships, however you look at it, and that’s one thing everyone seems to agree on.
Thanks for bringing this up. I hope to have my e-book/interview product on the subject finished soon!
All the best,
Marcia
Comment by Marcia Hoeck — June 24, 2009 @ 9:20 pm
Speaking as a VA I think the answer all comes down to open and honest communication.
Absolutely clear instructions and feedback from both sides. Before the client and VA can think as one they need to build a rapport which will also take a little time and hand-holding at the start but get this right in the beginning and you will have someone that your business can’t do without.
Also remember that VAs come from all different sorts of backgrounds and may not necessarily have the skills that your business requires. In this case you either find a VA that has those skills, or if you have developed a great relationship with your VA be prepared to cover the cost of training the VA. I have some clients who do expect me to know everything without the training that goes with it.
For both parties always be very clear about your expectations up front. I will always ask my clients, “when do you need this by?”, or I would say, “I can’t do it today, will tomorrow be ok?”
I personally have very few clients so that I can give a quick turnaround but sometimes two clients may clash with deadlines and I will get back to each one to determine their priorities. This works well for me.
Warm regards
Monika
Comment by Monika — June 25, 2009 @ 1:44 am
For me the key word in Kendall’s article is ACCOUNTABILITY to which I would add PROFESSIONALISM.
I have an on-going issue with a VA team that has a great on-line reputation and yet repeatedly fails to deliver, makes excuses, acts unprofesionally.
I have not fired them for the simple reason that I paid in advance for a bank of hours and can’t afford to right off almost a thousand dollars.
What I find especially amazing is that they know I have over 3000 friends on FB and could crucify the person in an instant were I to choose to do so. And here is another point - I know of other people who have had the same issues with this person and their team but have kept quiet rather than going public because if any of us did ….. we risk being seen as not nice and lose potential clients and partners. Feels like a lose whatever you do situation.
Comment by Gillian — July 2, 2009 @ 9:33 am
Hi Kendall, I just cant stop my self to comment on your blog. Good post. These tips are great.
Amanda
Virtual Assistant
Comment by Virtual Assistant — July 4, 2009 @ 7:29 am
Yes sometimes there just isn’t a proper fit between the client and the Virtual Assistant. The trick is in realizing that and learning to either walk away from each other or learn how to communicate and work towards building a strong working relationship.
Instructions can be misunderstood even from an assistant who is available on site. The client has to realize that VAs work with other clients as well. We are also business owners and therefore deserve to be treated as such and respected for our skills and talents that we bring to the business relationship. Don’t think of us as just an “assistant”. Many VAs have degrees and are very well educated and trained. Clients need to think of us as consultants and treat us with the same respect you would any specialist.
I don’t want to generalize about clients but giving us just enough information doesn’t help with the completion of the project. You need to provide as much detail and information regarding your project as possible. The more information you provide regarding your project the better we can service you.
A VA is not a secretary they are a business partner and strive to build a lasting working relationship with our clients by providing the best service and support that we can.
Comment by Francesca Frate — July 18, 2009 @ 1:21 pm
One of the biggest problems that causes this misalignment of interests and expectations is that many clients don’t understand the nature of the relationship. The mistakenly look upon a Virtual Assistant as an employee and think that a VA is going to work and be available to them in the same way as an employee.
That is not the case.
And to be perfectly honest, a huge part of the fault in creating this wrong expectation is Virtual Assistants themselves. Many are afraid to have any kind of frank conversation to set these misconceptions straight, thinking that it will cost them a client. But when you are running a business you simply have to set expectations properly in clients from the get-go.
You have to tell them what they may expect and what they shouldn’t expect. You have to let them know what YOUR processes and schedules are. And they have to be willing to work within these foundations because these are the things that allow you to operate your business effectively, sustainably, profitably and, most importantly, provide top-notch service–consistently–to all your clients.
And that means sometimes telling some clients that what they really need is an employee, not a Virtual Assistant.
Comment by Danielle Keister — August 14, 2009 @ 10:53 pm
Kendall,
Great article. This sure would help business owners manage their VAs. Business owners are the reasons why virtual assistants exist and they have the right to demand or reprimand VAs.
Comment by Business Office Assistant — July 26, 2010 @ 3:42 am